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How are you coping?

A dramatic life change – How are you coping?

Woah we didn’t see this coming did we? I think I’m still in shock at how quickly and drastically our lives have changed over the last 4 weeks. I am, for the most part, still in disbelief that this is actually happening to the world, to each and every person? So how are you coping? 

It’s like some sort of bizarre nightmare that I can’t wake up from? 

I wake in the morning and still, for a split second think – is this real? And then the realisation that it is still jolts me…… 

I cry often, but I also laugh often. There are some horrendously hideous situations unfolding right in front of our eyes and I’m literally heart broken most of the time.

Grief

I’ve been thinking a lot (hey what’s new – over thinker right here!) and all I can compare this too is possibly the stages of grief. I think it possibly is grief, it’s the best way I can describe it?

Grieving for our old lives, I guess? And for the loss of people we don’t know (or maybe do) but I feel it deeply…

So where are you? 

 

(Thanks to The General for this – 🙂 you Tik Tok star you!) 

Like everyone my life is so very different now.

I’m like a caged bird. I’m frustrated at the situation. I had no idea what a totally sociable being I am and how much I treasure being with people. Underestimations of how  precious human relationships are (a lesson maybe) I miss human touch.

Careers, jobs, education, finance – all so insecure, all so much worry. What can we do? 

We can try not to panic

We must trust and believe that things will improve, situations will change and that we will all be ok in the end, in the main. Easier said than done I know….  we need to just breathe 

Health – is THE most important thing right now. Full-stop 

Human Touch 

I have not touched a soul for 4 weeks and it’s really killing me! An arm around my mate, a cuddle with my mum, a kiss from someone close. A cuddle in bed – I absolutely ache for touch and contact. 

A cold bed a lonely soulless home, it’s tough. It’s tough for everyone. We must stay at home and we must be safe. This is a small price to pay

I know households that are full and I know that’s also very difficult –  frustration, cabin fever, boredom – all of it… we are all experiencing it in different ways, however I think we all feel a sense of loss and sadness. And maybe fear…. 

 

I wanted to write something to capture this at this point. I have so many emotions inside right now.  Encompassing the broadest spectrum imaginable, so vast and wide that even I  cannot even begin to explain very eloquently.

I seem to ricochet from high to low. I’ve talked to many and it seems a common theme. We need to just go with it…. and breathe

I also seem to feel different things on different days, it’s a cliché I know but it’s the most scary rollercoaster I’ve ever ridden. I simply don’t know how to feel? And I simply don’t know when we will be able to get off… 

I’ve stopped watching the news. I watch once a day for information. It was simply too much. Also I’ve unfollowed on social media, I don’t need negative right now. That in itself is liberating….

But there has to be a silver lining right? There always is

So what’s the Silver lining?

There’s always one, and often way more than one

Life is so very precious, it can be snatched away in a moment. We need to recognise this. We are not invincable 

Family – I miss my nearest and dearest – so much. My friends, as much… I will remember the times when I couldn’t see them and will always (more than normally) appreciate them. 

Nature – who knew hey? That my daily walk would be so precious – the routine, the fresh air, the hellos from strangers. Who knew that I could get so excited that I’m about to get my bike back that’s been in storage for 5 years and my lovely friend is kindly servicing it for me? 

Joy – I find it in a bag of stuff left on my doorstep (I’m a lucky lady). I find it in a text message from a caring person. I find it in a phone call or a FaceTime with my bestie, where we drink beer and laugh! And sometimes cry…

I’ve also learnt who is kind, who is caring and who would do anything for me. It’s not sometimes the people you think would? They even ask – How are you coping? 

It’s those messages that come out of the blue. Those people who genuinely care about your soul…. and maybe this is the first time you have realised just how much they love you? 

Cooking / Baking – what a joy to see people bake and cook with vigour. Using ingredients in different ways – I’m loving that. It’s such a massive change – I’ve seen my recipe blog traffic – triple!! 

I’ve struck up some lovely friendships in this period of uncertainty. Heart warming stuff.

Clapping for the NHS on a Thursday is a highlight – I’ve met people in my street (at 2M) that I have never seen before …… 

I’ve seen the families in the park playing football together, the joy on the faces of the kids who are just enjoying times with their mummies or daddies or both…. 

Playing Boardgames, bingo, laughing with friends over Skype, FaceTime, Zoom, House Party – whatever! We are lucky to have such tools. 

How and where will we end up?

Life will return to normal, but a new normal …. we have been and are still being stripped back and asked to stop, to think and to rest – who knew hey? 

I’m a planner, a thinker, a fixer – I’m totally out of my comfort zone. I’m learning slowly to just go with it and to stop fighting it…

We must never forget the strength of human connection and kindness – ever 

Can I help you? Is there anything I can do? 

A dramatic life change – How are you coping?

Please let me know how you are – Just drop me a comment 

Big Love 

Cx  (April 2020)

Comments

Jenny Walters says:
Yes 🤩 I hadn’t even thought how it would feel to not have a cuddle. That was my life for a couple of years before the kids. I can’t believe I had forgotten the feeling . It made me cry! Beautiful x
Sally Sheldrake says:
I think this will change some people forever
Neens says:
Hey you. Love this blog post. All on here thanks treacle. Stay positive but accept that some days you will feel crappy but just accept it and deep breath xx
dolly francis says:
You always speak from the heart... for me im still in the denial stages, perhaps i dont want to believe this is really happening because i dont understand the WHY? all i know , for me, my heart & arms ache for my grandaughters, for love & laughter over a cuppa with my family & friends... thanks for keeping it real & keeping me walking xxx
Lisa Fox says:
Well said C made me cry ! Sending love x
    Clare x says:
    Oh Hun - I didn't mean to make you cry - I'm just honest - it's tough - sending love xx