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Do we get what we deserve? Do we?

Ever wondered – do we get what we deserve?

Oh here I go again – thinking…… when will I every stop…. it’s a bit deep this one ūüôā Do we get what we deserve?

A question I have often mulled over, ‘do we get what we deserve’ in this life? Do we? ¬†I¬†think it’s a very difficult one to answer. Maybe ¬†it’s almost¬†impossible and I’ve been pondering this for a long long time.

I’m always asking – why? Why do these things happen to certain people…. why do some people seem to have all the luck and some quite simply don’t?

On one hand of course we don’t get what we deserve…. (we can’t). We don’t deserve all those wicked, horrid things that happen to us and our friends &¬†family, of course we don’t.

But my question is, do we get back what we put out there? Do we pre-empt what we get in our lives by the actions and decisions we take? I think the answer to that is partly YES.

I try really hard to be kind, to be generous with my time and my cash, to live my life according to my internal morals (I’m no saint obviously). ¬†I’m not a bad egg though, ¬†I try as hard as I can to help wherever possible. I go out of my way to help others, to support, encourage, to have¬†empathy¬†and uplift whoever I can.

I’m honest, straightforward I hope, a tad silly from time to time, but as someone said to me recently ‘basically sound’ (thanks). But I’ve had my share of bad stuff like most people, but also good stuff I guess…..

So if ¬†we believe we¬†are not good at something, be it at a¬†relationship or at work, do we¬†subconsciously choose partners or companies that fit the image we¬†have of ourselves? i.e partners who simply don’t shape up or do some people decide to ‘just settle’ for something? For something or someone who (or that) is not quite right?


Very recently I have decided that it is a resounding NO¬†for me (although it’s tempting) I cannot settle – ¬†I’d rather be alone or without than unhappy with someone or something that isn’t quite right.

So if we have a negative image of ourselves, do we always choose something not good enough for the real us, is our life and life course in our own hands??

Seriously I don’t think we get what we deserve in the main, ¬†but I do think we shape maybe what happens to us through our outlooks on life and our choices,¬†¬†especially in social situations. One of my biggest pieces of advice to anyone if they feel intimidated or not worthy or they think they don’t deserve something is simply to ¬†‘act as if’ or ‘fake it till you make it’ – it works, trust me.

Believe you can do it, do everything in your power to make it happen and more often it WILL happen. Don’t settle for second best ever…. you simply deserve the best.

People and different approaches…. why?

Another thing I have realised recently is that there are many different sorts of people, ¬†those who flounder under crisis/pressure and those who literally are able to ‘mend burst balloons.’

I’m not sure I can mend burst balloons, ¬†but what I¬†can do is attack any issue or problem with a set of action plans. No matter the subject. So why do some people come up trumps and others panic? It’s odd isn’t it?

When I try to solve anything РI turn to pen & paper РI am a firm believer in lists (Excel Spreadsheets if I must lol) and plans and being pragmatic and realistic, no matter the issue or problem.

I have also realised that you can only do what you can do, if you’ve done everything in your power then you can hopefully sleep with a clear mind, even if the issue is not solved.

Sometimes it’s about getting on a path, a path to sort it…. and sometimes that’s the hardest step.

Call it karma, payback or just blind luck, some people seem to skate through life with ease, while others struggle endlessly.

So where do you fit?  Do you get what you deserve? Do we get what we deserve?

Something to think about….. or am I¬†talking total mumbo jumbo? Possibly lol….

I’d love to hear what you think – please comment below the post

And if you are wondering where all this started then maybe catch my first ever relationship post Affairs of the Heart

It might all make a tad more sens


Do we get what we deserve?



Brilliant blog posts on HonestMum.com


Denise Lester says:
Who knows ? I am still trying to figure it out. But gonwith the journey only forward . And with a sense of equilibrium . Good luck and good fortune to you all
    Clare x says:
    And to you darling Denise x
Jane Kelly says:
Every word of your blog resonates with me. Such an interesting subject. And where do we get our strength from? I try and take one moment at a time, not even a day at a time when difficulties arise.
    Clare x says:
    Thanks Jane - glad you enjoyed - I agree one moment at a time Cx
Andy says:
Thought provoking, to say the least! I don't have an answer either.. I do know that there seem an increasing number of people with a sense of 'entitlement' that I don't understand. In the context of what you've written I'm wondering now whether they are persistently telling themselves they 'deserve' this , and they 'deserve' that. (Please be assured I'm not levelling that accusation at you Clare, it's just the thought you have provoked!) For me it's mostly about giving your best...and finding compromises where necessary...(I think!!)
    Clare x says:
    Yes Andy you are right! Entitlement (or not) seems a common theme, but I agree I think the answer is about doing your best and not settling for second best if it doesn't feel right Cx
Alex says:
I'm not sure about 'getting what we deserve', but what I think is that if you believe something is going to happen strongly enough and you go in with a positive mindset, things can often turn out the way you want. There's a quote I always go by - "Live life as if everything is rigged in your favour". Xx
    Clare x says:
    Love this!
Sandra says:
I think life sometimes gives us lemons, it may seem at the time unfair - but I try hard to play the glad game especially in tough times - I have two very dear friends who when faced with life threatening illnesses (one sadly no longer with us) never felt sorry for themselves it made /makes them appreciate everything so much more , in fact there was never a why me, just a love of life - yes I look around sometimes (as I believe I’ve had more than my fair share chucked at me) and think some people have charmed lives, but then I think about how life is so so precious and I stop myself. One thing I do believe we are far to materialistic these days. We need to stop and smell those roses, breathe a little and be kind to ourselves! Hope that makes sense.
Tony says:
Clare, I think that there is a universal equation that we can apply to any situation and it is a simple but profound mathematical truth. This truth is that negative values unless overwhelmed by positive values will always remain negative. I do believe that we get absolutely what we deserve, if our lives are full of negativity we attract and maintain an environment where negativity flourishes...Therefore overwhelm negativity with positivity, take control and through hard work, self belief and force of will we can all get what we deserve and that light at the end of the tunnel will remain permanently switched on.